


Our Queendom Come

by Gerudo_Fanfiction_Club



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety Attacks, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Experimental Style, F/F, F/M, Pretentious, Songfic, poetic prose
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-25 12:07:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14378325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gerudo_Fanfiction_Club/pseuds/Gerudo_Fanfiction_Club
Summary: The calamity has finally been banished from Hyrule. The goddess Hylia has kept her distance for a hundred years, to not corrupt her immortal soul. But when she sees her Champion battle foes he cannot defeat, slowly being crushed by the weight of his mind, she can no longer stay only an observer. She decides to Descend.Warning:this fic depictsdepressionas well asan anxiety attack.Please take care if you find these subjects triggering.





	Our Queendom Come

**Author's Note:**

> I was trying to draft a chapter for my crackfic [BBoH](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14367276/chapters/33167325) but then my hand slipped…  
> Songfic for [**Queendom by Aurora.**](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Nu_oGucpDI)It’s the air I breathe right now and it really made me think of Hylia and Zelda

I noticed it instantly – the pull of Darkness slipping out of this dimension to be washed away by the waves of time. The Champion had saved you, subdued Gannon – and you had banished him.

It’s hard to explain the sensation in a way that you would understand. Maybe a human equivalent would be the feeling of suddenly being able to breathe normally after a hundred years with a terrible cold.

_The underdogs are my lions  
                              The silent ones are my choir;_

some of you had kept singing even during the century when I had failed you. My statues were clean. The children had clad them in flowers. A small boy left me a small copper coin, kissed my stone cheek, whispered _“thank you”._

_The women will be my soldiers  
                             With the weight of life on their shoulders;_

those had been the words of mine that pushed your soul into being, so many cycles ago. I was glad to see that it still held true.

It sparkled iridescently amongst the houses of Hateno village, still light and pure as a feather. The one hundred years of battle had ruffled it, but it still fluttered serenely in the palm of my hand.

It only trembled slightly when I carefully joined it within the confines of your body.

                             * 

“Link”, you said, “this is a bit like retirement, isn’t it?”

Your laughter tinkled like bells around us. You were sitting side to side with him outside his home in Hateno – you with your notebook, he with his sword. He looked up from cleaning it, eyebrows tightly knitted.

“ _No_ ”, he rasped, more a plea than a statement. Your confusion slithered like snakes around me; I tried to gently soothe them.

“No…”, he tried again, “I’m still… I still need to help them”, he mumbled.

“But wouldn’t you like to… I don’t know, slow down? I mean, of course your help is as invaluable now as ever, but now you can do _more_ than just be the Champion! You will have time for _yourself_ now, although I’d of course be grateful if you choose to help me – I have started to draw up plans for a national security initiative that would safeguard every corner of Hyrule from both internal and external threats – and you’d be better suited than anyone to train them, right? Of course, that would only be a part-time commitment…”

Your excited calculations died out in your mind as you finally looked at him: he had gotten up without you noticing, standing rigid and pale.

“I, I have to…” he stuttered, before stumbling off.

                             *

He did not return to you that night. You tried to busy yourself – by observing regional flora, by studying all the equipment in Link’s house, by visiting the laboratory. You talked for hours to anyone who would listen – about your plans for better laws, gentler taxes, fairer politics.

Your words were a stream, sharp and sure. But your thoughts were a circle, dizzying your mind: “ _What did I say wrong?_ ”, they echoed. I opened myself, just a gentle crack, and let you drink from me.

_Drink until you’ve had enough  
                              I’ll drink from your hands_

Slowly, gently, your thoughts went to rest. You carried me back to the house – I felt suddenly fragile as I shared my strength. But know that I would do anything to keep darkness out of your eyes, my love – you may drink me dry, if I can see you smile.

_I will be your warrior  
                             I will be your lamb_

                             *

You woke up by someone rustling in the living room.

“Link?” you tried. No one replied, and the rustling continued. The floor was cold under your bare feet as you got out of bed, the cool breeze telling you that the door was left open. You pulled the night gown close around your body before descending the creaking stairs.

He was a flurry of motion – piling books, dusting shelves, sorting trinkets and artefacts from his travels. His movements were sharp and desperate as he searched for something, _anything_ , to clean, to do.

“Link… what’s wrong?”

A shield hung slightly tilted on the wall – he threw himself towards it, righting it with shaking hands.

“Please, you’re scaring me…”

“Not now”, he said, “I need to…” He scrubbed obsessively at the shield, trying to rid it of a stain that had set too deep.

“Link, _stop._ ”

He paid you no mind, his knuckles whitening as he clenched the fabric.

“ _Link_ , _STOP IT!_ ”

He flinched, cutting his hand on a hard metal corner. A droplet of blood welled to the surface, dark and red. “ _Oh_ ”, he whispered at his hand – as if surprised to see it. He looked at you.

“I’ve”, he tried, after a moment, “I’ve done everything, there’s… no one else to… I cleaned the stables, hunted for the villagers, I… helped with the crops, I think, and maybe I …built something, I think a table”, he nodded, ”yes, a table, for the girl by the windmill, but…”

His breathing came in short, shallow bursts, as he stared at you, _begged_ you; he didn’t know for what, and neither did you.

“There’s nothing more to _do_ , Zelda”, he realized, “everyone is _fine_ …”

“No one needs me anymore.”

His voice was breaking and with it your heart, but you had to stay strong, for him.

“No – no, you’re wrong!”, you pleaded, “We still need you, Link! _I_ still _need_ you, please don’t say that!” You rushed towards him, but I nudged your mind away from letting your body embrace him – with my permission, you took his hand, gently.

His eyes were glazed over, and his breaths came shorter and shorter – he was hyperventilating. His body was trembling, mouth moving with unspoken words. Face pale, skin sweating, heart hammering.

“Zelda”, he choked, “can’t… _breathe_ ”

You firmed your grasp on his hand, hoping to anchor him – “Yes”, you implored, “yes you can”, and then, “I’m _here._ ”

You kept the panic out of your voice as you gently tried to guide him back. Five minutes felt like five hours, with your steady words of _“it’s alright, I’m here, you’re here”_ and “ _good, good – deeper”_ as his breathing slowly began to mellow out. You carefully led him to the couch, never letting go of his hand, where you sat him down next to you. His head dropped to your lap and you stroked your fingers through his hair.

“I’m here”, you said. “Let go.”

And then, the champion cried for the first time in a hundred years.

                             *

As you cradled his body close to yours that night, your mind whispered to me:

“We did this to him. He doesn’t know who he is without Ganon – the only thing he knows is how to fight him, after all. But I’ll help him. I’ll help him remember how to live. Even if I have to drag him to every damn corner of Hyrule for him to remember.”

“And if there’s truly no place for him to find here, we’ll _make_ one for him, you hear me? We’ll redig the lakes, redraft the mountains, repaint the fucking sky, till a place comes that can hold him.”

_Till queendom come  
                             Till queendom come_

The feather of your soul was hard and sharp as silver around me, the pain as it cut me a gentle promise – you would fight the demons in his mind that the Master Sword couldn’t reach. We would hold him, till he could hold himself – together.

_My queendom come  
                              _ _Our queendom come_

_*_

After this, Link’s mind stilled, and with it, his body. He rarely got out of bed, sometimes not even to eat, but you were there, caring for him, gently but firmly. You were so confused, struggling not to be frustrated – “ _He’s not even sad!_ ”, you threw at me, _“he just doesn’t seem to… care, for anything.”_

“I feel… fine”, Link had told you. “I’m just _really tired_ , is all. Maybe it’s time for another one-hundred-year- long nap?” he had chuckled, but the smile would not reach his eyes.

                             * 

Together we travelled Hyrule, you and I. You hunted for items from Link’s past, and knowledge on how to restore memories. You debated with the scientists of Hateno and Akkala, prayed to the dragons of Lanyaru and Eldin – and as you did, my heart went heavy with love for the land around us.

 _The sea waves are my evening gown_  
                              _And the sun on my head is my crown_  
_I made this queendom on my own_  
_And all the mountains are my throne_

But I knew that I did not truly belong here. Not in this time, nor in this body. My heart felt like a stone – is that what mortal love feels like? Could I really abandon this feeling after tasting it? Would my soul even be able to Ascend, with the weight of my heart pulling me down?

 _Drink until you’ve had enough_  
                             I' _ll drink from your hands_  
_I will be your warrior_  
_I will be your lamb_

I drank – the love, the joy – all of it. Even when the weight of it became almost unbearable, I kept drinking. It was not for me, I had decided. At the end of my time here, I would surrender the Love I carried – I would gift it to Link, till he could grow his own.

_Till queendom come_   
_My queendom come_   
_Our queendom come_

*

Nothing worked. Your mind shut out my pleading as I cried for you to stop, to _slow down_ , to just _be there for him_. You couldn’t listen – you have always been stubborn, and above all else, you believed that stagnancy would mean that you stopped caring. I tried to tell you that it was stagnancy and stability he needed, as his own mind was adrift, but for a long while, you wouldn’t hear me.

 _I hunt the grounds for empathy_  
_And hate the way it hides from me_  
_Of care and thirst I have become_

You threw everything you had at him – traces of his life in the form of his old royal armour, his admission letter to the royal guard, his aptitude scores from the first years of his training – all the while explaining, telling the stories of a life he no longer lived.

This is not him. He is no longer this person, I tried, to no avail. When the vast reserves of my patience finally began to ebb, he snapped.

“ _SHUT UP!”_

He was sitting on his bed, hands wringing the fabric in frustration. “Stop, please stop, I don’t _know_ that person!” Then his eyes grew suddenly wide. “Shit, no, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry I yelled at you, it’s just…”

“Oh…” you whispered, dropping the papers in your hand like they had burned you. I could feel your mind decelerating, and _finally_ , you heard me.

“I’m so sorry…”, he whispered at the floor, “please don’t leave me.”

You carefully joined him on the bed and allowed him to hide in your arms.

“No… it’s me”, you sighed in his hair, “I wouldn’t stop and just _listen_.” Tears gathered in your eyes. “I would have seen I was hurting you if I would have just _been there_ for you!” His sword-rugged hands gently massaged your back.

That night, it was your turn to cry. I felt your need for privacy, so I entered Link’s dreams and poured out the Love I had gathered there, whispering softly:

 _You have a home in my queendom_  
_You have a home in my queendom_  
_You have a place in my queendom_  
_You have a home…_

The next morning you woke him up at the crack of dawn, face set in determination.

“Get up”, you said. “We’re riding.”

                             *

I did not comprehend why you had brought us to Kara Kara Bazaar, at first. Your earlier mistakes stemmed from the lack of variables – now that you held all the knowledge, I could trust you completely – after all, no one can solve an equation like you. As long as you remembered that minds were more than numbers, I would let Link rest safely in your hands.

It was the evening of Summer Solstice and people had travelled from every corner of Hyrule to partake in the celebrations. The Bazaar was bustling with life – merchants with their wares, musicians preparing their performance, dancers warming and preparing their limbs – life was happening here, with an intensity that staggered me. I had never been this close to it before.

The entire ride there, Link had been empty and quiet. The familiarity and enjoyment of riding kept him going at the times his body had wanted to surrender, along with your words, my love. They were no longer of someone who he wasn’t, but of someone he _is_ , to you. Do you even realize how it feels to be touched by your heart?

The music, the rhythm, lit a fire of the purest _joy_ in his eyes. His heart was beating with the rhythm, and his mouth was humming the melody. He looked scared – his mind couldn’t remember this feeling, but then, his body did. He stood suddenly, pulled you with him, and began to dance.

_Till queendom come  
                             Till queendom come_

Your bodies moved through the dance like water. You painted patterns in the sand with your feet, spelled out intricate stories with your hands and wrists. After a moment the music mellowed, and as the musicians prepared for the next song, you asked him:

“Do you remember this, Link?”

“Yes!” he laughed, “I remember! We danced all night, didn’t we? I _loved_ it! and then we…”

“I loved you”, he remembered. The bird of your soul crumbled in pain and joy, so I carried it gently in my hands. And then,

_My queendom come  
                             My queendom come_

“I love you”, he realized, and took your lips in a kiss.

The bird fluttered; I let it go.

 _Our queendom come_  
                             _Our queendom come_  
 _Our queendom come_  
                              _My queendom come_

                             *

My Princess,

Through you, I got to taste Life again – the sadness, the pain, the anger; the happiness, the joy, the love – all of it, because of you. I might have made you, once, but in this blink of time, you were the creator and I the created.

There was a point to this monologue, you know – something I wanted to tell you before I left. And it is this: for all that you have given me, my love, I will forever carry you in my heart.

And your memory will live in my immortal soul until the end of time.

**Author's Note:**

> This was gonna be a drabble to exorcise this amazing song from my head, where it’s been buzzing for days. Suddenly it’s been half a day and I’ve listened to it on repeat for hours. Oops.  
> Please tell me what you think! What style works/doesn’t work? Is some part too pretentiously painful compared to the rest lol? Would be very happy to get feedback of any form!  
> Thanks for reading <3  
> I know I took a lot of creative liberty with Hylia and the only canon thing abt this is her name, but... i was chanceless


End file.
